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Trade Skills

Trade Manuals

The following manuals can be printed, double sided, on parchment paper (not plain white paper!) and sewn or lashed together to make a portable trade manual.

Alchemist – 15xp – Version 2.1
Bard – 10xp – Version 1.2
Barkeep – 5xp – Version 1.3
Barkeep Effect Card – Version 1.2
Blacksmith – 15xp – Version 1.4
Companion – 10xp – Version 1.0
Enchanter– 15xp – Version 1.1
Enchanter Item Cards – Version 1.0
Enchanter Known Enchantments – Version 1.1
Escort – 10xp – Version 1.0
Healer – 15xp – Version 1.3
Healer Bill of Health – Version 1.3
Healer Extra Infection Cards – Version 1.3
Herbalist – 10xp – Version 1.3
Hunter – 5xp – Version 2.0
Instructor – 10xp – Version 1.2
Laborer – 5xp – Version 2.0
Merchant – 5xp – Version 1.1
Merchant Seller’s Permit – Version 1.1
Picklemonger – 10xp – Version 1.3.1 [Clarification Note: Any pickled food can be used in this trade, not just pickled cucumbers]
Soldier – 5xp – Version 1.0
Surgeon – 15xp – Version 1.0
Weaver – 15xp – Version 1.3

Trade Kit Examples

Barkeep

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Enchanter

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Escort

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Herbalist

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Hunter

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Instructor

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Laborer

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Picklemonger

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Soldier

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Want to submit your kit and earn 2XP? Use the template below and send it in with photos of your kit to lasthopelarp@gmail.com!

TRADE KIT SUBMITTED BY:

TRADE:

DESCRIPTION OF ITEMS:

HOW ITEMS WERE PROCURED:

CHARACTER RACE & CULTURAL INFLUENCE ON ITEMS (if applicable):

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Healer & Surgeon by Rachel Miller

Healer & Surgeon

Submitted by Rachel Miller

DESCRIPTION OF ITEMS:

  • Braided leather belt – used for tourniquet, for people to bite on to roleplay pain, or to tie up rowdy or captive patients
  • Wood plank – used to stabilize metal limb wounds
  • Bloody & Clean cloths & bandages
  • Needle, thread & scissors for sewing up wounds. Scissors can be used to roleplaycutting someone’s shirt open to access a wound. (Obviously don’t cut their clothing)
  • Various bottles filled with herbs.
  • Mortar & pestle for grinding up herbs or reagents to make salves
  • Bucket for water – sometimes on hot days this is great to cool players down when theycome for healing
  • Small pliers for pulling things out of wounds- arrow heads, bits of rusted blades, debrisfrom the woods, even teeth from bite wounds.
  • Many mats
  • Bottle of “pain medicine” -breath mints
  • “Smelling salts” & “ether” – used for putting a patient under and rousing them aftersurgery
  • Leeches & maggots – for bloodletting or clearing away rotted flesh on old, infected wounds.
  • Surgical masks
  • Sand timers, trade manual, pens, bills of health, body location dice (for maims). 10 sideddice for success rolls.
  • A tin cup – used to get patients water or make fake potions for them to drink for expelpoison
  • Ulven healing rune signage

HOW ITEMS WERE PROCURED:

Many of these items were purchased at thrift stores or walmart/target-amazon.

The surgeon tools are from medieval collectibles.

The bloody cloths were made by splattering white cloth with deep red paint.

The hot dagger is a cheap foam dagger from Amazon that I painted with acrylic paints to look hot.

The fake leeches and mealworms are fishing tackle!

The bottles are mostly from the dollar store and the herbs in them are just salt, parsley, coriander, etc. I try to select things that fewer people are allergic to.

The Ether is just a bottle of water with its cork glued shut. The smelling salts are table salt heavily laden with essential oils.

Many of the blankets and mats that I use are thrifted. I tend to buy things that are nice and thick to put a bit of padding between a player and the ground. Bamboo or ratan mats are great because they don’t pick up as much dirt or leaves as a blanket

CHARACTER RACE & CULTURAL INFLUENCE ON ITEMS:

My kit has influence from Ulven culture. Many of the containers used to hold my items are wood or woven. Several of my items also include runes on them. I even made a sign with the rune Uruz, which hangs wherever my healing kit is set up as we are trying to establish it was a known symbol for ulven healers in Mardrun.

I have several furs throughout my kit. Their practical use is to keep the bottles from blanking into eachother and breaking during travel. I also use them as a pillow to pad people’s heads from the ground.

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Trade Alchemy by Leticia Alcorta

TRADE KIT SUBMITTED BY: Leticia Alcorta

TRADE: Alchemy (+my Chocolatier mods)

DESCRIPTION OF ITEMS: 

I have a fondue pot to be my burner for heating/boiling water for distilling and melting chocolate

Small mixing bowls – I filled them with little things to make potion making more interesting, like alka-selzer for bubbly effects and chocolate powder for the drama of being a chocolatier.

Mortar and pestle, for the process of refining some reagents as needed and general role-play while making potions and healing chocolates

Potion Bottles for the potions

Stabilizing powder, baking soda in a jar for the drama while making potions

I use a propagation station as my beakers and stands for making potions. I put fake candles under each beaker as well

I also have a tea pot that I use as flavor for roleplay and dropper bottles with colored water for roleplay mixing up ingredients.

HOW ITEMS WERE PROCURED:

The fondue pot, propagation station, and all my bottles are from Amazon. The mixing bowls and beakers are from HomeGoods, and the mortar and pestle is from a small Mexican grocery store in Sun Prairie.

CHARACTER RACE & CULTURAL INFLUENCE ON ITEMS:

My character is a human that comes from a background of people who constantly travel, so everything in her kit is still that can fold down or fit into my picnic basket or backpack. I also did research to be able to infuse the health potion into chocolate, so I keep extra props to show that as well, like jars of chocolates. The fondue pot works well to represent the chocolate being melted down and turned into a healing chocolate.

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Salt Beasts

In the year 271, Duchess Madeline D’Argent of the City-State of Newhope put together a crew to voyage to the Outlands to expand an outpost there. After their ship was damaged and the crew was forced to make their way into the Outlands in search of supplies to repair the damage, they discovered they were not alone. A single Syndar watched them from a distance, coming closer to speak to the group. In this conversation, the crew learned that an entire population of Syndar lives in the Outlands, seemingly completely untouched by the mana stream and unaffected by magic.

Very quickly, this crew also learned that there are worse creatures than the Mordok lurking among the trees.

The Syndar taught the group that these creatures were called “Yolqui” by their people, who have fought them for generations. Since then, Mardrun has come to know them as “Salt Beasts”– a nicknamed dubbed for the thick, salty hides of these monsters.

Their most notable features are their limbs, each one a different variation of grotesque protrusions that are often mistaken for swords, but being struck by them causes much more severe injury than any normal sword strike, and it becomes quite clear from closer up that these weapons are grown straight out of their arms.

These creatures have been seen using arcane magic to fell enemies, often releasing a ear-wrenching scream before throwing death-bolts at their targets. Once they’ve taken down their target, a flash of light is seen as they Recall away, presumably to consume their downed target in relative safety.

Their skin can be seen sloughing off their bodies, dropping to the ground in piles of rotting, salty flesh. This shedded skin holds no value or special ability, despite the Northern Syndar’s use of the Salt Beast skins as armor. Presumably, this means the Salt Beast hide needs to be harvested in a certain way to be usable.

These creatures have not been picky in their hunt for targets, attacking the living, the dead, and Mordok alike. The only difference between their hunts in what they decide to take, as one was seen leaving the body of an undead behind. This supports the words of the Northern Syndar– “They are hungry for meat. It doesn’t care where the meat comes from, only that its fresh.”

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June 2026 – Sharp Tongues, Sharper Iron

=Event Story=

Stories of hardship and glory travel up from the southern front, where Newhope and Clan Stormjarl’s forces have successfully bridged their frontlines at a difficult cost. Clan Grimward’s raiders at sea remain a threat, but cannot stop the supplies and aid reaching Clan Stormjarl via the new land-bridge. Meanwhile, whispers travel the former lands of Clan Shattered Spear. The flame of resistance that had fought for freedom and revenge over the last few months… is snuffed out. Survivors, freed thralls, and figures important to the clan’s future begin to emerge from the Great Forest after escaping Clan Stonetooth’s grasp, allowing more of Shattered Spear’s people to be reunited in their current home within Clan Nightriver.

As the heat of summer begins to arrive though, news quickly travels from Hammerfall. The mixed army of Aldorian Marines, Shattered Spear remnant warpacks, and Clan Goldenfield warpacks had continued their advance against Clan Ironmound over the last month, but reports begin to arrive confirming that Clan Ironmound has successfully pulled their lines back to the Hammerfall area, and are now bolstered by their prepared defensive positions. The towns of Bladehome and Shieldhaven remain stranded behind Ironmound’s lines and under constant siege since last year. The two walled towns still stand, but may be at risk of falling if the sieges last much longer, making the need to push Ironmound back further a critical effort before the army of Clan Stonetooth returns to this frontline to attack once again. Any attempted advances by allies have already proven costly though, with Ironmound’s defensive tactics proving to be difficult to crack.

Unexpectedly, the call for aid from any available allies comes not from martial forces in the area, but instead from Jarl Laela Nightriver, Ambassador of Clan Nightriver. Through her efforts, contact has been made directly with Clan Ironmound’s Clanleader, Gustav Ironmound, who has agreed to a meeting of delegates on the frontlines to receive discussion and be heard in return. Contact has been successful, but due to being enemies Ironmound has sent terms.

Their time has been offered up, but requires payments of services, honorbound, or resources to be made to their clan in trade. After a trade is agreed upon, Ironmound’s leaders will allow discussion to happen for as long as battle happens, as enemies of this war. Some may see this as too high of demands from the clan, but others see that Ironmound even just becoming neutral could put them at great risk of angering both Clans Grimward and Stonetooth enough for invasion, making their homeland’s surrounded situation a lethal one for their people. Thus, Ambassador Laela’s calls for aid are not just for those who have words to speak, but also those who have offerings to provide and those skilled in combat to fight while discussions happen.

For those who have fought against Ironmound, their developing hatred for their current allies of Clan Stonetooth has become as well known as their honor strict culture. Many believe that the clan had no interest in fighting in this war, and would have been neutral if not for their pact with Clan Grimward and their clan’s precarious location as the war developed after the first year. With that, some like Jarl Laela see the war’s new situation as an opportunity to help the clan’s return to neutrality with honorable trade, or with luck maybe even convince them with enough aid to switch sides all together.

Rumors have it that Clan Ironmound has been pressured to fully apply themselves to the war on Grimward’s side, so if persuasions fail it may see the sieges of Bladehome and Shieldhaven severely worsen as Stonetooth’s armies are soon to return to the frontlines.

=Event Summary=

Duels waged throughout the day while peaceful talks took place across the outpost. The Clanleader of Ironmound was no easy negotiator, nor were his warriors easy to fight. 

While the results of the day were by no means questionable, especially the celebrations that followed, Clan Ironmound is making their new stance known across the continent. In the days that followed this impromptu “Moot,” leadership across the continent are receiving the following letter:

“To the whole of Mardrun,

Clan Ironmound hereby withdraws our allegiance from the Ironward Alliance and Clan Grimward’s joint war effort with Clan Stonetooth.

We understand the gravity of this declaration, and the perceived stain on our honor it will leave behind. We make it with clear minds, knowing full well the judgment history may pass upon us. Some will call us traitors. Others will call us cowards. We accept that burden.

What we cannot accept is continuing to fight for those who have long since abandoned the honor and principles the Ulven people have always upheld.

The Ironward Alliance was forged to defend our people, to protect our homeland, and to wage war with honor. We did not swear to tolerate disrespect in matters of honor or to watch our allies create more enemies by allowing fallen warriors bodies to lay out and rise again.

Our loyalty and commitment to the Ironward Alliance came from a place of honor, and of Ulven who stood by their honor in the face of uncertainty. We now understand that our loyalty has been mistaken for obedience.

Honor is not blind submission. It is the willingness to stand by what is right, even when doing so demands sacrifice. An oath binds both those who swear it and those who receive it. The Great Wolf is not subjective in his judgments; Honor is Honor and the stain on ours will be hard fought to be righted again, but it is not something we can fix from within the confines of an alliance with Clan Stonetooth.

Leading up to this day, through many battles over the last year, Our opponents have shown us their honor. No matter how much blood is spilled, they never turned their backs on what is right and honorable while facing uncertain odds. Their actions, when compared to our previous allies, are not a small part of why this decision has come now.

Clan Ironmound officially stands with Newhope, Clan Nightriver, Clan Shattered Spear, Aylin’s Reach, New Aldoria, Bladehome, Lumeria, Clan Goldenfield, and all others who choose to oppose the terror of Clan Grimward and Stonetooth.

For Grimward and Stonetooth, much the same as our announcement to join your side of the war, let this missive be a warning to you. You have the remainder of the month to see your exit from Ironmound territory, after which the fight will continue with us being on opposing sides of this conflict.

May your steel be forged in honor.  

Ironmound Warleader Einar Stonefist”

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Lanterns in the Night

The time has come. Rain wipes her sweaty palms off on her skirt, unsure if it was caused by nerves or the heat of the day.

She looks to Niedre.

Niedre who has been her teacher.

Niedre who had been a voice of comfort and reason when she felt like her life was uprooted.

Niedre stands by observing, twirling a pendant in her hand, her face serious, giving the respect due to the ceremony and to the fallen before them. She gives Rain a curt nod, encouraging her to proceed… and a small smile.

Rain steps up to a body, laid out on the ground on their back before her, their head to the North, their palms facing the sky. Connected directly to the earth, open to Solar and Lunara.

She gently pulls 4 stones from her bag, attempting to keep them from clinking together noisily. And she walks slowly around the body, placing one stone at their left, one at the foot, one at their right, and finally one at their head.

This isn’t someone Rain knew. This is just one of many in the blur of faces lost to this war. Rain does her best to hold back a scowl. Would someone cry for them? Miss them? Surely. She hopes their death meant something. That hers some day might too.

She takes a deep breath and refocuses. This ritual is what she has control over. This is the one kindness she can offer to the people she has no words for – reclaiming their mana to the stream. They would be with their loved ones again soon.

Rain next takes a small bottle of blue fynch oil from her pouch, and anoints the stones, calling upon the gods as she does.

“I ask to be a vessel…” the first stone

“That my body may act as a bridge…” the second stone.

“That the mana of this body may flow through me…” the third stone.

“And return to the stream.” The fourth.

Rain takes a careful seat alongside the body and touches her hand to theirs, still a little surprised at the coldness of it, but she doesn’t let on about it.

She focuses on the lingering glimmer of mana in their body. Mentally pulling at the thread of light, gently, until it starts to give.  And then she begins to tenderly spool the energy alongside her own.

Rain takes a deep exhale and lets it out, settling herself into a comfortable position. She digs her fingers into the earth at her sides, and faces the sky, feeling the warmth of the sun heat up her mask and the exposed skin around it. And then she slips into meditation.

Rain feels the taken parcel of mana wind out from her body slowly as she offers it back to the stream – a gift gladly absorbed.

Once fully gone from her body, Rain lowers her head and opens her eyes beneath her mask.

“It is done. I commend this life and return the mana that it held back to the stream that it may find new form and purpose as the gods see fit.”

She rises, looking to Niedre once again.

Once it is done, they leave the deceased with their loved ones, allowing the family to prepare their last goodbyes in peace. The pyre is already built, now comes the final sendoff. Lanterns in the night. 

As they leave in the quiet and distinguished way that Reclament should, Niedre resists the urge to grin and smiles meekly. She nudges Rain lightly, shoulder to shoulder. “Well done. I believe you’re ready.”

Rain looses the breath she didn’t realize she was holding.

Niedre sees a mirror in Rain’s reaction, the one she herself hoped to have one day when her own mentor, Aeronwen, decided she was ready. But that day is gone. And this one is in front of her. She reaches in her satchel and removes her book carefully, almost reverently. They find a spot where they’ll remain undisturbed, and Rain copies down the ritual she just performed into her own. The code, the ceremony, now hers too. 

“Where should I go?”

Niedre clicks her tongue then pauses for a while, giving it heavy thought.

“I owe much to Shattered Spear… and Hammerfall has put out a call for aid. We could travel together. Surely some of your compatriots of the Broken Blade will be present. And I’m sure that they could use their Reclament,” Niedre says with a wink.

And Reclament Rain can’t help but smile.

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Kló

PLAYED BY: Talon Wyclyf Olsen

CHARACTER NAME: Kló

GENDER: Woman

PRONOUN(S): She/her

CLASS: Cleric

AGE: 40

RACE: Ulven, Path of Gaia

HAIR: Dark brown, almost black, and nearly shoulder length.

EYES: Gray, appearing green or blue based on the lighting. (or if I find out I can wear color contacts ulven approved green, need to see an eye doctor to find out if I can).

OCCUPATION: Escort.

KNOWN SKILLS

  • Can swing a sword but is not battle tested.
  • Can sing pasably well.
  • Gives excellent massages.
  • “That thing you like”.
  • Wit.

BIRTHPLACE: Grimward land near watchwolf territory. 

APPEARANCE: Large for a woman but not unusual for Ulven, long legs, strong build. The kind of woman they call “a handsome woman”.

NOTABLE TRAITS: Often has complex runes marked on her face, they clearly have meaning but only to her.

RELATIONSHIPS

  • A few family friends in Spiritclaw, Wetfinger territory. 
  • Her family in Grimward, 3 sisters, 6 brothers, 9 cousins, her parents and their pack of aunts and uncles Pack Screaming Hawk, all dead to her now, and likely furious if they knew how she felt, and to see her with colonists.

RUMORS: 

  • A very skilled professional.
  • Gives sound advice, but will just listen if you need to talk.
  • A woman of negotiable affections.
  • A Grimward outcast, taken in by Spiritclaw.
  • She’s clanless, not actually a member of Spiritclaw, and has renounced her clan Grimward.
  • Does “that thing you like”.

BIO / BACKGROUND HISTORY: Kló was 14 in 250 when the colonists first arrived, being on eastern Grimward territory isolated her from them for a time. She only first heard of them around age 27 the end of 261 as her family’s homestead was in the path of Grimward advance and too close to Watchwolf for comfort.

The family had also received word of a sudden illness causing a death of a family friend, who’s labor was heavily relied upon by her elderly widow. 

At the funeral Kló met Gráinne and her wife Freydis, they all became fast friends and stuck close to each other the rest of the evening.

After the funeral rites had been seen to Kló’s family leader told her to stay and help care for the farm with my younger siblings. Her family left them their to go join Grimward as warriors. She stayed and worked the farm, teaching her younger siblings how. When the elderly matriarch of the house passed she felt too saddened by the place to stay, leaving her siblings the farm she headed for Aylin’s Reach.

Aylin’s Reach became her home, she was captivated by the cultures she saw and, she made friends with many people, coming to find joy in their art and the differences in cultures. She began working as an escort providing succor to those interested and in need of relaxation. She liked helping people feel better. 

She has lived there ever since, feeling that she cannot go back to Grimward, as she feels unity is everyone’s only chance of survival with the threats posed against everyone from the undead, the penitent and the Mordok, and now Grimward and Stonetooth.

She is now 40 in 276 and this next event may see her make friends with some people that make her want to act to help change things for the better.

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Lysandra Zealranger

PLAYED BY: Cerise Pipson 

CHARACTER NAME: Lysandra Zealranger 

GENDER: Female 

PRONOUN(S): she/her 

CLASS: Cleric 

AGE: 30 years 

RACE: Human 

HAIR: Blonde 

EYES: Blue 

OCCUPATION: An ordained Sister of the Order of Arnath 

KNOWN SKILLS: Archery, first aid, basic divine magic 

BIRTHPLACE: Aldoria 

APPEARANCE: 5’5” chick wearing red and black with a bow and a sword

NOTABLE TRAITS: nothing out of the ordinary 

RELATIONSHIPS: fellow members of the order 

RUMORS: none…for now 

BIO / BACKGROUND HISTORY: Born in Aldoria in the year 245, Lysandra was like many a surrendered child of the war against the undead. Her parents, who were members of an Aldorian based chapter of the Order of Arnath, were sent on a mission to defend a monastery from the undead when she was just 5 years old. With her parents gone and unlikely to come back to raise her, she was given into the care of the Order as many people of generations before her had been. Upon being transferred to the care of the Order of Arnath’s Fist, she was brought to the fledgling fortress of Starkhaven. She grew up to work as a tenant of the city; learning and laboring as all colonists to the new world had to in order to survive. Though she lived her life in

the care of the Order, she had not yet considered becoming a cleric of the Fist. Her youth as a ward of the Order left her with conflicted emotions about what service in a martial order means and who ends up paying the price. 

Her mind slowly began changing as a new divergence on the path of Arnath was revealed. The Order of Arnath’s Light, with their more progressive views, had a much more attractive temperament than the Fist and their rigid military focus. The catalyst that was to completely change her mind came from the civil conflict within Starkhaven. She was not on either side, but rather, was one of the citizens who survived the strife caused by the Order itself. Having seen the chaos firsthand and feeling helpless to stop it, she made the difficult decision that she would stand before she ever felt helpless again. She could not stand to see another tragic mistake caused by narrow-mindedness and fear. This realization cast a harsh light on her own thinking, showing her that fear and narrow-mindedness had kept her from recognizing the true merit of service above self because her parents had abandoned her for a similar cause at such a young age. Lysandra joined the Light shortly before the formation of the Arnathian March and the dissolution of the chapter system on Mardrun. She has since spent the better part of the last decade training to earn her place as an Eagle. Her zeal and perseverance through her struggle to find her way along Arnath’s path earned her the surname Zealranger. Her hard work and dedication to this new direction the Order has taken is paying off and she now looks to add her efforts in the service of a greater good. 

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A Lifeline in Pieces of Me

Your name–give them your name, child.’

Blood rushed in my ears, deafening and growing louder with every heartbeat. The contents of my bag spilled out in my struggle to find the bottle, but there! There it is, cold in my hand despite the heat of fight, a bright red health potion. I tear out the lid with my teeth, my arm far too mangled to be of any use, and bring it to my lips. I can hear the Clanleader’s wet, choking breaths not too far from me—but I already know. There’s nothing anyone can do for him, just like there’s nothing anyone can do for me.

I chug down the health potion and feel the heat of my rage rise again. Someone’s walked away with my hammer—first my father, now my mother—

“My name is Hersir Runa Jorahsdottir, the Unflinching Spear, Honored Few of the Great Wolf’s Hunt—

Shattered Spear is not crushed under the boot of Stonetooth—

Shattered Spear is a bastion of everything that is Ulven—

Everything you are not.

And finally, the world goes black. 

“Just as my hunt began with her father, we shall end it with her,” A wretched voice croons, and I feel my soul within me anchored to the thin shred of life I had left. “Put her next to Laifnar,”

I barely feel the ground as I’m dragged across it. The gaping hole in my abdomen, the gristled mangle thats left of my arm—the pain of it all radiates throughout my body so much I barely hold on to consciousness. Im thrown against the side of a structure, something solid. My head bounces off of it, falling to the side where I see a body laid up a few feet from me. The view is a haze, and he’s covered in blood, but the man is unmistakable. Laifnar chokes on what I can only assumes are his final breaths right next to me.

“Gaia’s embrace awaits,” I try to cough out, but the sound doesn’t even carry to my own ears.

Footsteps approach, then Hyrrokin crouches down in front of him. 

“Congratulations, my conquered Clanleader. A great honor is coming to you,” she tells him, smiling wide. “Be assured, your pain will not be wasted.”

I don’t see it, but I hear it. A knife sinks into his gut, wet and squelching, and a shallow gasp falls out of Laifnar’s throat. There’s a wet suctioning sound, then a thud into the dirt, like a wet rope falling to the ground. Hyrrokin says another prayer—something about pillars and the Earth Mother—and Laifnar’s breathing gets deeper. More sturdy.

She’s keeping him alive. I watch her hand disappear inside his gut, then pull free more innards, tossing them towards me to land in the dirt. The hot spray of fresh blood streak across my skin, a strange pleasantly warm feeling to make me realize how cold I’ve become. 

It goes on for long—too long, for this kind of suffering—enough that I feel the anchor holding my soul within me loosening. 

Hyrrokin’s eyes turn to me. “Oh no, we can’t have you fading off too soon. It’s almost your turn,” she says, shifting towards me. 

She doesn’t make it more than one step before there’s shouting in the distance.

“Mmm, more of your kin, Jorahsdottir.” She snarks, jerking her chin towards the other Stonetooth stood watching. “We’ll bring them to witness their Clanleader’s true glory,”

Their footsteps move further into the distance, until eventually I don’t hear them at all anymore. All the sound thats left is the soft, gurgling chokes from the man beside me. My eyes refocus on him, feeling myself fading faster, my vision tunneling as I fought to keep my eyes open. I watch his chest rise once—twice—and with one final choked inhale, no more. 

I feel my own cold body fading from me. The footsteps quickly approaching don’t matter—Hyrrokin can’t bring the Clanleader back from this anyways. Can’t bring me back. Atleast she wont get the satisfaction—

Hersir!” A harsh whisper carries, then a body thuds down into the dirt next to me. A soft hand grabs my chin, pulling my head towards the newcomer and my gaze away from the Clanleader. “Hersir Runa, right?” she says, pulling her bag into her lap and hastily ripping it open, pulling bandages and bottles out, then cursing and tossing it aside. “Ack–no time. Gaia take my hand.”

She weaves mana, muttering prayers rife with profanity. If I had breath in my lungs, I might even laugh to appreciate it.

“There’s a group of Daughters nearby—but we figured out after hearing your fight that we are not making it out of here.” She explains, lifting something heavy wrapping the strap around me. “But you—you are a fighter. A true child of the Great Wolf. If anyone can make it out of here, and if there’s anyone Shattered Spear needs right now, its more of you.” 

The shouting in the distance has faded, and I watch her rise to her feet. 

“You have to move as fast as you can. I’m sorry I couldn’t do more, there just not enough time—-” Her voice is cut off by the sounds of Stonetooth returning. 

Now! Up! Up!” She frantically whispers, grabbing me by the not-mangled arm and pulling me up to my feet. My vision sways, blurring and nearly going black. “Run, Runa, you must run!”

She pulls me further, dragging me past the outpost walls. I hear something whiz past my head, then she gives me one last shove. “Keep going, don’t stop!” she cries. 

I hear a solid thunk—must be those archers trying to pick us off—then screaming as she tries to fight back.

My feet keep carrying me forward. Past trees and through creeks and ditches, it all blurs into the same landscape over and over, to the point that I’m not even sure which direction I’m going, or for how long. 

The world blurs, that cold feeling creeping in again, until finally—its all gone again.

But there’s flashes. Consciousness gained sporadically, showing me nothing about where I am, nor who I’m with. I’m being dragged by my feet—smart, considering the state of the rest of me—and I can feel my hammer has been laid across my chest. It must be what the Daughter wrapped around me, the one piece of me I would’ve been devastated to lose again.

My eyes trace the man dragging me, catching on a belt flag, but my vision is blurry, and I can’t quite make it out. The darkness around me—nighttime or death, who knows—grows and wanes, until I’m once again propped up against something sturdy.

“Someone will find her here, we’re close enough.” A voice says, “Hopefully the right people, but this is the best we can manage.” 

Another person sighs. “Good luck, Longfang.” He says, backing away. He turns, and I see it now. The unmistakable fang on his belt flag, green-striped and bright white. 

They keep walking, footsteps fading into the distance as once again, a distinctly not-silent distant sound reaches my ears.

“Next time I say fill that hole in the line,” A voice I recognize floats through the trees. “I expect someone to fucking move into it!”

Volrok!

“Healer, get this warrior out of the way and back up! Baird! Get in here and hold that flank!”

My vision fades again, the world going dark to the sound of a living friend.

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The Fable of the Ever-Punctured

The last thing he felt was the blade of her knife being drawn from his chest. After that, everything melted into a warm haze of sensation. Voltaire sat with his back against a tree, dragged there by a now dead shattered spear archer. He had requested to be left there as it was the sunniest spot he could see within the dense tree cover. The dagger he had hoped to leave in his enemy’s throat now lay unused beneath a crumbling wooden shield to his left, and in his right hand now slaked in his own blood was the amulet on Sol he held so dear; torn from its chains by a stonetooth spearhead. Every breath he took was harder than the last, and he choked on the blood pooling in his mouth. They finally managed it… Voltaire, The Ever Punctured, brought down by poisoned arrows and wicked swords. 

A fitting end, he thought. His choice to stay behind and fight saved more lives than he could count, and promised hope for the shattered spear people. By the light, Sol would be proud. Even as his life began to fade he could feel the warmth of the sun comforting him. Soon, he would know what lies beyond the veil, and he would join his fallen brethren in the light eternal, ever watchful over the world of the living. His only regret was that he did not tell his comrades where he was going… News of his death may not ever reach them. 

But his reluctant peace was interrupted by something… or rather someone, screaming. The knife being held to Voltaire’s throat wavered, and as though she could not believe what she was hearing the Stonetooth Hearthsworn turned her attention away. He could hardly make out the words over the ringing in his ears, but he knew that voice. It was Runa! Hersir Runa was alive? How?… Surely this warband had cut everyone down. How was she still breathing? Just then more voices joined the din. Yells of pain and barked orders. “Bring her down!” one voice shouted. 

“It seems like you didn’t finish the job,” Voltaire rasped, his lungs protesting to even the lightest whisper at this point. “Perhaps you should take care of that first.” He murmured towards the Hearthsworn. 

She responded by plunging the dagger into his stomach. Voltaire barely registered the pain. The pressure from the blow was more pressing, as the jolt knocked what little air was left out of his lungs. Perhaps not his best work, but as far as last words go, one final jab at the competence of your enemy seemed an apt use of breath. He would not take another. And as his vision began to dim, the last thing Voltaire saw was the light of the sun beaming through the leaves above.

The darkness that welcomed him after was calm and inviting, like the hug of a long lost friend. His thoughts turned to home… the home he knew before Mardrun. Faerun spread before his mind as though not a day had passed since the last boat set sail for the new world. Before the dead scourged the land. He could see the rolling hills and dunes of his childhood home. The merchant village he and his father called home for all those years before the fall. He remembered long nights of practicing forms from his father’s old martial manuals, trying and failing to perfect his footwork. He thought of his father’s sword… gleaming in the firelight of his home set ablaze… the snarls and growls of the dead. He heard the screams from that day, as loud and as clear as could be imagined. As though he was right there again. He stepped forward, to match the walking corpses shambling toward him. And as he raised his sword, his footing faltered. Teeth found purchase on his arm. Then his leg. Then his neck. 

Voltaire awoke screaming. His heart pounded in his ears and his breath struggled to catch itself. He gasped for what little air could be found before he realized what was happening. He was… breathing. His heart was beating. Startled by this revelation, Voltaire shot up from his back, only to be rudely interrupted by the sharp protest of his stomach. He winced at the pain, and corrected his approach, slowly raising himself into a sitting position. He scanned his surroundings carefully. Voltaire found himself on a small cot in a dark room of a wooden cabin. The only light in the room came from a small lantern hanging on the wall by his bed. In the flickering light he saw the glint of his ruined armor resting in a heap on the other side of the room, and beside that were his shield, sword, and spear. Everything was caked in dark red stains. Relief began to take hold in his still racing heart as he turned his attention towards the gash that had been torn through him mere moments ago. Or… well… what he thought was mere moments ago. How much time had passed? Where even was he? The last thing he remembered was losing consciousness deep within shattered spear territory. Had he been captured and nursed back to health by the enemy? Was he enthralled? Where was Runa?…

These questions raced through his mind as he examined his bandages. Around his torso was wrapped a large roll of cloth, strained red with blood. On his leg was much the same, as well as left arm. He lifted the dressing on his chest, flinching at the initial sting before examining ragged stitches running nearly from his clavicle down to his sternum. Along his abdomen was a gash held closed by fine twine and a herbal paste. His head held a small quilted pad affixed with what seemed to be linen cloth soaked in tree sap. Whoever had done this was obviously no stranger to battle wounds. This was the work of a professional to be sure. And as he felt around in the shadows of his body he came across a wound he didn’t remember receiving on his right shoulder. Below a small bundle of cloth tied down with a scrap piece of burlap was a jagged little arrow wound. Voltaire knew the feeling all too well. He’d taken more arrows out of his body than he’d care to recount. But how did that get there? He never took an arrow there, and certainly not one like this.

Just then, the door to his dark little room creaked open. Voltaire’s breath caught in his chest, realizing too late that whoever might have closed his wounds might still be around. From the doorway blew in a cool breeze that sent an uncomfortable shiver up Voltaire’s spine, which was closely followed by the shadowed form of a large man. As the light from the lantern fell upon the man, his eyes were the first to catch it. They were brilliant emerald jewels against the inky blackness behind him, and they bore a fresh hole into his heart as he stared. Ulven for sure. Even in the dim light, his fangs could be seen beneath his lips. The ulven man and Voltaire locked eyes for what seemed like an eternity before the silence was broken by an uncomfortable cough from the unknown man. He cleared the distance between them in two strides, pulled up a stool from one of the less illuminated corners, and sat beside Voltaire.

“So you are alive then. Good. I was worried I had finished the job.” The ulven man said, a hint of embarrassment edging into the low rumble he took for a voice.

“It would seem so…” Voltaire replied cautiously. He still had no idea who this man was, and so reserved his words.

Silence fell between them before the ulven spoke up.

“You… were in pretty bad shape when we found you, human. Your wounds were great. It was no small task pulling you back together, and even after that we had no idea if you would survive.” 

Voltaire perked at that. “We?” he questioned.

“Ah… right. There are others here. My pack-mates. We were resting at this hunting camp when you stumbled out of the trees half crazed and covered in blood. We are awfully close to the forest you see, so I thought you might be a ghost…” The ulven winced a bit as he pointed at the arrow wound on Voltaire’s shoulder. “That would be my handiwork… My apologies.”

Voltaire considered this. “I see…” He trailed off, his mind trying to piece together the story. He had made it all the way to the forest?… From shattered spear territory?… That’s nearly 80 miles! How did he?… 

“I… uh… Just wanted to let you know that you don’t owe us for this, if you were worried about that.” The ulven man said sheepishly, interrupting Voltaire’s concentration.

“Huh?… Oh… right. That’s… Very appreciated,” Voltaire recovered quickly. Questions that deep could wait. “So, I’m guessing I have you to thank for this stitching? I have to compliment you. This work is superb.” 

The ulven man looked taken aback for a moment before smiling and letting out a small chuckle. 

“With these hands? I’m lucky I can hold my bow as steady as I do! No, this is Halthgotha’s work. She’s our trapper. Not just handy with iron, she’s also a magician with a needle and thread.”

“Halth-goo-tha… I see.” Voltaire pondered that for a moment. He never would have expected a trapper to be capable of this. “I’ll be sure to thank her when I can stand.” Voltaire let a small smile cross his face. The ulven man regarded him and let his smile grow in kind.

“As well you should!” He quipped. “Were it not for her keen eye, we would have cut off your head!” The ulven man’s casual mention of brutality unsettled Voltaire. He tried to remain composed.

“Ha… Yes, that would make sense if you thought I was a walking corpse.” The irony of that wasn’t lost on him. He must have certainly looked the part. Voltaire the ever punctured rising again as a member of the living dead of which he’d spent the better part of 20 years fighting against. The jokes at his rotting expense would be legendary.

“Well, regardless, thank you for NOT taking my head. Halthgotha is a kind soul if nothing else just for that.” Voltaire tried to shake the thought from his head. “So… What is your name?”

The ulven regarded him once more, a warmth in his piercing green eyes. “My name is Skal. Skal Birchfodder, of Pack Timberborne, Clan Whiteoak. And you are?” 

“Voltaire… My name is Voltaire.” He replied. 

“Just Voltaire? Well now I feel a bit overdressed,” Skal snarked. His mood had noticeably improved since the beginning of this conversation, and it seemed now he was happy to make jokes. “Seems an awful shame to have just one name after what you’ve been through.”

Voltaire thought for a moment on that. Back to his youth. Voltaire was the only name he had ever gone by. His father insisted it was a family tradition… or something approximating one. Last names were reserved for those who accomplished something great. And when you had earned your name, you would be given it. You did not choose your name. The closest thing Voltaire ever got was his mocking title of the Ever Punctured. Initially a joke at his expense for always being the first to take a wound in battle, but now a badge of honor he wore with pride. But… not a name. Not his last name.

Skal must have noticed Voltaire’s expression fall. “Are you alright, friend?” He asked, compassion in his voice.

Voltaire shook himself. “Yes!… (ahem) yes… sorry. Got lost in thought there.” 

Skal turned to the door, then back to Voltaire. “Well, We’ve got a fire going outside. Care to take a chance at walking? I’m sure the warmths will do you good, and I’m sure you’ve got a hell of a story to tell!” He encouraged. He rose from his stool, which now looked comically small next to Skal’s imposing frame. He stood nearly a head over Voltaire, and was just as broad. His hands were large and adorned with simple jewelry, and his clothes were drab and utilitarian. Really it was his size that made him stand out. But despite his intimidating size, he held a softness in his eyes that put Voltaire at ease. 

“You know what? I think I’ll take you up on that.” Voltaire replied chipperly. Skal offered his hand, and Voltaire took it readily, wincing against the aches in the rest of his body. He swung his feet over the side of the bed and attempted to stand, but his legs would not obey. Before he hit the floor, Skal was there. He muscled Voltaire back to his feet, and then hunched over to offer a shoulder for support. Together, they slowly tottered out into the crisp evening air. 

They had indeed been in a humble wooden lodge. A shack, by the looks of it. Animal skins and worn iron traps hung from the rafter beams of the overhang just outside of the door, and beyond this covered porch was a modest campfire. Around it sat 3 more Ulven in similar garb to Skal. Two males and a Female. The female he immediately recognized as Halthgotha, the one who had patched his wounds. The other two males looked on in bemusement.

“What have you got there, Skal? Is that dinner?” the first male barked, laughing at his own cleverness.

The second male chimed in, “That’s about the biggest thing I’ve ever seen you take down, Skal! We’ll be eating well tonight!” The two men jostled each other in delight.

“Oh, will you two shut it? I swear, you pups must have been dropped on your heads growing up.” chided Halthgotha. Her voice carried on the wind like a thunderclap, and the two raucous men were cowed no sooner than Voltaire and Skal had reached their seats near the fire.

Skal placed Voltaire on a log that was acting as a bench for the group, and then sat down as well, letting out a contented sigh. The fire crackled and spat sparks, the slightly damp firewood being all that was available. The air around them carried the scent of pine, birch, and cedar. Voltaire took a moment to savor the sensation. Something about nearly dying has a way of elevating the simple things, it seems. But as he sat drinking in the fragrant air, Halthgotha spoke up.

“Im glad to see my work paid off, human. Skal there was worried sick you wouldn’t pull through. The big softie thought that arrow he shot into your shoulder did you in,” She smirked. Skal let out a grumble as she continued. “But really, after you didn’t die the first few days, I was pretty sure you would survive. I kept telling him ‘Skal, with how bad his injuries are, that arrow is the LEAST of his worries’, but he wouldn’t listen. He sat beside your bed for nearly 5 days. Until today, that is.” Halthgotha gave a wink.

Voltaire looked up at Skal, who at this point was turning an amusing shade of red. “5 days?… By the light, how long have I been out?” Voltaire wondered aloud.

One of the males from across the fire spoke up next, “You mean you don’t know?… Do you even remember Skal mistaking you for a Drauger?” He said, a hint of mockery creeping into his voice once again. Halthgotha hissed at the man without a second thought, and he promptly dropped his grin.

“No…” Voltaire replied honestly. His voice was low and soft. “I dont remember a thing…”

Hathgotha leaned forward on her stool, seeming to engage more than she already had. “We found you stumbling out of the great forest. Skal likely told you as much when he no doubt apologized for that hole in your shoulder. But what WE are wondering,” She made a sweeping gesture to everyone around the fire, “Is how you got into the forest in the first place.” 

Her eyes were now locked on Voltaire. Halthgotha seemed to be an older ulven woman. Somewhere in her 40s by his guess, though its hard to tell sometimes with Ulven. They seem to visibly age faster than humans, though best he can tell they can live just as long. Her hair was dark brown with streaks of gray, braided into long and wild locks adorned with beads and feathers. Her eyes were a vibrant yellow, reminiscent of the wolves from which they take their namesake. She regarded the wounded Voltaire with equal parts suspicion and curiosity, and Voltaire could do nothing but squirm under her gaze. She was intense. He tried to gather his thoughts as quickly as possible.

“I was never IN the forest!” Voltaire blurted out.

Now even Skal was staring at him. Not with Halthgotha’s scrutiny, but sheer curiosity.

“But this is where we found you,” chimed Halthgotha, Her voice betraying growing distrust. “If you say you were never in the forest, then where the hell were you? And how did you get here?” She was pressing now. Judging by her demeanor, she was the leader of this small group.

Voltaire tried to gather himself. These people helped him… they saved his life. They just want to know what happened. So just TELL them what happened!

“I… was in shattered spear territory. Skal knows this much already, but my name is Voltaire. I am the High Martial of the Blades of Sol. I had made… a terrible mistake in the line of duty that put hundreds, if not thousands of shattered spear lives in danger. So… I reached out to Hersir Runa of Clan Shattered Spear. I told her that I owe her, and her people, a debt. One that I intended to pay dearly for….”

“Hold on! Hold on, wait,” piped up the other man, “YOU… were fighting for Clan shattered spear? You! A human…” 

Nobody bothered to reprimand the interruption this time. It seems the question was on all of their minds.

“Yes, I did,” Voltaire continued. “Runa sent me word not a day after my offer saying she planned on taking advantage of that blood debt. And so I secreted myself away from my allies. I met with Runa and her cohort, and together we went north to link up with Clanleader Laifnar Icefury. But I must warn you… from here, it is a long story.”

Again, nobody spoke up. The group seemed intent. So Voltaire recounted the events of the mission that led to his presumed demise. The ambushes, the outpost raids, his one on one combats with several stonetooth warriors, the lives lost, the lives saved, and the heroic last stand he and his fellow warriors made as the main Stonetooth forces closed in on the region. The group of ulven hunters around him seemed to hang on his every word.

“And then as she heard those last words, she plunged the dagger into my stomach and WRENCHED across. After that… Well… You actually know the rest of the story from there.” Voltaire concluded his telling with a small amount of charades, much to the chagrin of his aching bones. Skal and Halthgotha had been leaning forward in their seats listening intently. The other males, whom Voltaire now knew as Flouky and Raulk, had been participating in the retelling by acting out the fights in dramatic fashion. By the end, everyone was enthralled. Skal was the first to speak.

“Unbelievable… You managed, somehow, after having your guts spilled for people you will never meet and not even your own, to crawl your way across nearly 80 miles of wilderness, just to have another arrow wound added to the pile of scars you carry,” Skal shook his head with a sigh. “By the wolf, I feel even worse now.”

Voltaire scooted closer to Skal and gave him a reassuring pat on his wide back. “Oh don’t feel bad, my friend. It’s just another story to add to the pile of mishaps for the Ever Punctured.”

Halthgotha, without skipping a beat, and barely stifling a giggle, “wait… the ever punctured? By Gaia’s grace, is that what they call you?” Her mirth was terribly hidden, but Voltaire beamed with pride regardless.

“It sure is!” He proclaimed, “Right, I think I skipped that part. Voltaire, the ever punctured! That’s me! That’s a story for a different day, but the short version is that despite my armoring, my enemies always seem to get past it. A Mordok once pounced on me during an expedition, and it snaked a dagger beneath my breastplate to get right at my heart! It took two healers to drag my carcass to a bed and staunch the bleeding before that same Mordok, infuriated that I was still alive, rushed the camp just to kill me! You’ve never seen a half dying man flop out of bed so fast in your life!”

At that, the entire crew burst into laughter. The twins Flouky and Raulk were rolling on the ground in hysterics. Skal had nearly fallen off the log as his head threw back in a deep belly laugh, and Halthgotha was clutching her stomach she was laughing so hard. Voltaire too was chortling along with them as much as his ribs would allow it. This band of weary souls told stories and laughed together all into the night, sharing drink and food until the sun began to crest over the horizon. And as the golden rays shined down on a brand new day, Voltaire felt at home. Not the home he had grown accustomed to here on Mardrun, not the home he had found in his comrades in Lumaria. No… This felt like how it used to be; how he imagined true home felt like. Strangers made friends from the most unlikely circumstances, stories and songs traded over firelight, and the promise of a life well spent clinging to every word. This is what he fights for. This is the life for which he holds such high regard, and would gladly give his own to defend. Voltaire watched the sunrise together with these Whiteoak Ulven in pure contentment before Skal began to speak.

“Voltaire, the Ever Punctured. An unbelievable story for an unbelievable man… Makes me think.” Skal began. Halthgotha snorted.

“Oh no, you aren’t thinking of writing a song about this guy, are you?” She said, disguising her contentment with sarcastic contempt.

Skal’s face once again changed shades. “Well… I haven’t decided yet.” He admitted bluntly.

Voltaire simply sat there, enjoying the comradery. He knew that come tomorrow, he would be on his way back to Lumaria to get the worst scolding of his life from Elzerith and Seymore, so he was intent on making the most of this, while he still had the excuse of being too injured to travel.

Halthgotha spoke up again, “You know what Skal? I think you are right. Anyone who has survived as much as this guy deserves something to be remembered by! Tell us Voltaire! What’s your full name? Let us know so we may let the great wolf know of your deeds!” She was really getting into the spirit of this now. But Voltaire shrank back slightly.

“Voltaire IS my full name… Atleast right now it is”

“Oh?” Halthgotha looked inquisitive. “And why might that be, friend?”

Voltaire took a deep sigh. “When I was young, my father told me about a tradition. Something of a rite of passage as he saw it. I am meant to earn my last name. But I can’t choose it… It must be given to me by those who believe me deserving. And to date, that hasnt happened yet. Beyond the whole ever punctured business.” Voltaire shrugged a bit at that. He did appreciate the title, as much of a joke as it first was, But it did always bother him that it wasn’t a last name. Thats really all he ever wanted. 

As silence fell over the band, both Skal and Halthgotha exchanged glances. There seemed to be a silent conversation between them. Skal nodded his head to his left towards Voltaire, Halthgotha shook hers in kind. Skal motioned again, a little more forcefully this time, and Hathgotha stared at Skal, hands clasped under her chin in contemplation before giving a nod. Skal broke the silence once more.

“How about… Ulfkin?” 

Voltaire blinked for a moment, thinking he might have misheard. “Excuse me?” He asked, barely containing his sense of disbelief.

“Ulfkin,” Skal repeated, “Voltaire Ulfkin, The Ever Punctured. I think it has a nice ring to it, personally.” Skal was not hiding his smile any longer. Neither was Halthgotha. The two of them looked to Voltaire for something. Recognition? Denial? A blank stare? No, All they got was silence for a good long while… Until he jumped from his seat and nearly fell into Skal’s lap, trying to embrace him. He couldn’t hold back his tears. 

This may not mean much in the end, but to Voltaire, in that moment, it meant everything. After nearly 30 years of living, fighting, hurting, and a few times dying… he was recognized. Not by some lofty station or duty. No dukes or lords in sight. Just… People. Everyday folks who saw his worth, and found him deserving of what so many might take for granted. A name. A last name. The last name he will ever have. And it is said that after that faithful night, Skal Birchfodder wrote this song to commemorate the man known in taverns across Mardrun as The Ever Punctured Knight.

Once upon a time, my friends,

And not so far from here.

Once fought a noble knight of Sun and Sword who knew no fear.

Though fearless was this man of faith

Though clad in shining steel,

The metal of it’s make was poor, and wounds he’d have to heal.

His name is known, though some may say

A joke was played on he

For from this day, He will, we say, The Ever Punctured be.

The fable of this punctured man

Is short and course, tis true.

For on the field of battle, a spear ran him clean through.

His armor rent, his belly bare,

He fell upon the floor,

And were this not the Ever Punctured, dead he’d be for sure!

But on that day, some will recall,

While horns and signals cry,

His broken battered body rose, and through the trees did fly!

But not on loft, nor eagle’s wing,

Though some may dare assert,

But broken knee, and bloody hand, and clumps of trodden dirt.

To fly… or limp, more aptly put,

The ever punctured went.

Through the battle lines he slumped, his armor torn and bent.

The warriors of tooth and spear,

Their energy near spent,

They paid this walking corpse no mind, as through the mud it trekked.

And as the ever punctured walked,

His guts held in by hand,

He heard the voice of God ring out, “My boy, your wound is grand”

“Indeed,” Said He “but ill be fine! This wound is but a graze!”

“But with no trail left to find, I might be lost for days…”

“Fear not” replied the voice on high,

“For I am light of day”

“And in the gleam of Sun, to thee, i shall ignite the way”

And lo, before this broken son,

The light did show a path!

And hobbling along, he sped to spare his life from wrath.

It took the Ever Punctured

Nearly two whole days and nights,

To find a camp of sullen men, all weary from their fights.

He fumbled on his feet, and cried,

And to their feet they dove!

An arrow nocked, the bow was loosed, and in an arrow drove.

Clean through his shoulder, sharp and true,

The arrow head did lodge,

Into the bone of poor Voltaire, Why cant he learn to dodge…

When next he woke, on bed he lay

A bandage on his arm.

The giant gash now wrapped in cloth to halt the further harm.

The Ever Punctured sat and said,

“To whom am I to thank?”

But no reply came from the dark, It seems an awful prank.

But as he look, his saw the scar,

And felt his bruising head.

“No wonder” He exclaimed aloud, “They must have thought me dead!”

“BUT YET I LIVE” He roared into the dark and silent night.

“And when I’m off this cot, it’s back to war to fight the fight!”

Now smarter men than he, im sure,

Would call its quits from there.

But not the ever punctured… Not the ever sweet Voltaire.

His armor will not stop a sword,

It will not stop a stick.

But armor is not needed when your skull is just as thick.

So RAISE your glasses, One and all

And join me in this Toast!

Three cheers, The Ever Punctured Lives! Died more than most can Boast!

Last Hope Larp